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The Grad Student, The Archivist, And Mitch McConnell's Wife

11/30/2016

Books by Patti Liszkay
"Equal and Opposite Reactions" http://amzn.to/2xvcgRa
and the sequel, "Hail Mary" https://www.amzn.com/1684334888
Available on Amazon.

THE GRAD STUDENT, THE ARCHIVIST, AND MITCH MCCONNELL'S WIFE

I see that Elaine Chao,

...wife of Senate Majority Leader Mitch McConnell,

...has been chosen by President-Elect Donald Trump to be his Secretary of Transportation.
Many years ago I used to know Mitch McConnell's wife.
I'm not talking about Elaine Chao, but McConnell's first wife, feminist scholar Sherill Redmon,

...with whom I worked for while between 1977 and 1978 at the University of Louisville Archives and Records Center.
Back then Tom was a graduate student at U of L and I landed a job at the Archives and Records Center working on organizing and cataloguing thousands of documents from the Louisville and Nashville Railroad into a researcher-friendly collection.
Tom and I were oh-so-happy newlyweds at that time in our little apartment on Utah Street in Louisville, with our mini-stove,

...our three small rooms full of second-hand furniture,

...and our front lawn, where on nice evenings we'd often sit outside on lawn chairs eating bowls of ice cream and listening to the local radio station. (At that time we didn't own a TV, not because we couldn't afford one but because we couldn't be bothered).

Also at that time a young up-and-comer named Mitch McConnell had just won the race for the politically powerful position of County Judge for Jefferson County, Kentucky. After the election his was a name that everyone in Louisville knew.

When word came to us at the Archives and Records Center that Mitch McConnell's wife Sherrill would be joining us as a grad assistant while working on her PhD, the feeling was a little as if we'd now be having a local celebrity - or rather, a local celebrity's wife - among us.

  But Sherrill McConnell, the name she went by back then, was no celebrity-type.
     Pregnant with her third child when she arrived at the Archives, Sherrill was a sincere, intense and purpose-driven person. But at the same time she was very sweet, kind and maternal and there was a gentleness about her that shone through her beautiful brown eyes.   Sherrill was petite, and though she must have been eight or ten years older than me and was far from fussy in her dress or hair - I never saw her wear make-up - I always thought she was really cute.   In any case, she was really nice and well-liked by everyone at the Archives.
     Tom finished his master's degree in the summer of 1978 and in the fall of that year we moved from Louisville to Columbus, Ohio where Tom had been offered a job. I never again saw Sherrill though I did keep in touch with some of my former fellow archivists for a while longer.
     As for Sherrill, who now goes by Sherrill Redmon, she went on to Smith College in Northampton, Massachusetts to become the director of the Sophia Smith Collection of the Women's History Archives, described on the Sophia Smith Collection home page as "an internationally recognized repository of manuscripts, archives, photographs, periodicals and other primary sources in women's history."   In her years as Director Sherrill worked to expand the Collection to make it more racially and culturally diverse and to fill in the gaps in the historical record. She also worked with Gloria Steinem on an important oral history called Voices of Feminism.
   I have two clear memories of Sherrill McConnell.
    The first was when she was going to be required to ride on a float with her husband the County Judge and wave to the crowd in a parade through downtown Louisville during Kentucky Derby Week.   On the morning of the parade Sherrill arrived at work all dressed up - actually she was wearing a cute denim jumper, which was dressed up for her - and her co-workers were teasing her about how she should wave from the float. She then struck a Queen Elizabeth pose and began doing the Queen's signature cupped-palm wave, which cracked us all up.
      My other memory of Sherrill was of one time when I asked her how her husband was enjoying being County Judge and she shared with me, looking at me with those deep, earnest brown eyes, that she was so happy for Mitch because up until now he had felt as thought he were stuck in third gear and now at last he finally felt as if he were in first gear.
     I imagine these days Mitch McConnell must be in Mach 5.
     But then I don't expect I'll ever have the opportunity to ask Elaine Chao about it.

References:
http://www.smith.edu/libraries/libs/ssc/about.html

https://www.smith.edu/library/libs/ssc/news/redmon.html

https://www.c-span.org/video/?170790-1/writings-betty-friedan

34 Comments

Songs Of Gratitude

11/28/2016

1 Comment

I'll admit that this past Friday I missed out on the traditional Black Friday pastime of shopping 'til one drops, but only because I was saving that activity until Saturday when my daughter Theresa and her wife Callie came to town, and then we did indeed shop until I almost dropped,

...and probably would have had we not stopped for a meditation break.

However on Friday night Tom and I carried out what we hope will be our Black Friday tradition from now on: we headed out to the Old North Columbus area,

..to the historic Maynard Avenue United Methodist Church,

...for Columbus folk-singer Bill Cohen's Alternative-To-The-Black-Friday-Buying-Frenzy Thanksgiving Concert.

Since he retired three years ago from an almost 40-year career as a National Public Radio reporter on Ohio Statehouse news, Bill Cohen has bloomed in his second career as a folksinger,

...regaling us local folks with his beautiful tenor voice throughout the year in concerts that invariably morph into sing-alongs as we his fans join in the songs he and we love: the familiar and singable ballads, folk tunes and popular songs, especially from the 1960's.

The cost of entrance to Bill Cohen's concerts is generally a donation at the door. All of the money raised is then donated to a charitable cause such as the Ohio Food Bank or, in the case of the Thanksgiving concert, to fund Bill's wife Randi's volunteer work in the Dominican Republic,

...where she donates her services as a translator for the doctors and nurses with the International Medical Alliance of Tennessee on their medical trips to that country.

Though Bill performs at various locations around town, the venue for the Thanksgiving Concert is an especially beautiful and intimate one:

the church sanctuary,

...all decked out for Christmas.

Though the theme of this concert was "to remind us of all the gifts we have: nature, friends, freedom, families, music, art, our miraculous bodies and emotions", I believe that night what we were all most grateful for was the opportunity to listen to and sing along with Bill,

...as he accompanied himself sometimes on guitar,

...sometimes on piano, and sometimes accompanied by drummer David Maywhoor.

   Bill started the concert with a zippy sing-along version of "Zippity Doo-Dah", which is his own daily morning affirmation of gratitude for waking up to another day of life.
   For an hour and a half we listened to and sang along with such songs as "Thank You For Being A Friend, "What A Wonderful World", "Sunshine", "Oh, What A Beautiful Morning", "Starry Starry NIghts", "America The Beautiful", "We Shall Overcome", and a dozen others, including two heart-tugging songs of love and longing, "My Cup Runneth Over With Love" and an old World War II song about loved ones being far apart called "I'll Be Seeing You".
      In case anyone would like to make the acquaintance or re-acquaintance of these two very beautiful songs here are the youtube links:

      "My Cup Runneth Over With Love":    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rw2_VrjwctA

       "I'll Be Seeing You" :    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nvq4OnhMEO4

       At the end of the concert Bill Cohen sent us off with the reminder to "savor every little thing that's good in life".
       I was thankful for that reminder.

1 Comment

Still Pilgrims After All these Years

11/26/2016

6 Comments

On Thursday Tom and I and our son Tommy, the only of our children available this year, once again became, along with many of our fellow Americans, pilgrims for a day.
For our family on Thanksgiving day all roads lead to Amherst, Ohio,

.. where Tom's sister Mary Jane,

...her husband Ken and their family always host the yearly gathering of their branch of the family tree.
For us the ride from Columbus to Amherst, a town in northern Ohio about an hour west of Cleveland, feels as much a part of the Thanksgiving Day ritual as the meal itself. Seems we're always on the look-out along the way for the same peculiar or distinctive houses or Amish farms or examples of American-byzantine architecture in the small towns we pass through.
This year we broke with our from-time-immemorial Thanksgiving pilgrimage ritual of stopping along the way at the Goasis,

...a popular oasis for travelers along Interstate 71 with stellar but too few ladies' room stalls for the number of consumers (see post from 7/28/2014),

We finally asked ourselves (rhetorically) why we always stop at this place where it's guaranteed I'll have to face a long slow line to the ladies' room,

...when there's McDonald's a short distance down the road, which might offer more commensurate facilities,

...which indeed it did.
Before leaving I went up to the counter,

...which was fairly busy in spite of the holiday,

...and ordered a small Diet Coke.
      It never ceases to amaze me how nice and friendly food service folks always are. Even those who were working at this McDonald's on Thanksgiving day were cheerful, and the girl who took my order informed me that the soft drinks were all the same price, a dollar, whatever the size, and so suggested that I might want to get a larger size since I would pay no more than for a smaller.
     I thought: 1) That was very nice of that girl, who, though she had to be there working on the holiday was still nice enough to tell me about the soft drink deal, and 2) It was somehow heartening to learn that a corporate entity in offering all sizes of drinks for a dollar had perhaps taken a nano-step back from striving to wring every conceivable cent out of every conceivable transaction.
       Anyway, I left that McDonald's feeling a warm sense of gratitude for small things.
       And so we arrived at the our destination to join those of our clan who could make it, all of us so happy to see each other again,

...from the youngest,

...to the oldest, Tom's 98-year-old father,

And when our Thanksgiving feast was ready,

...and all laid out in a lovely spread,

...we filled our plates,

...under the guidance of Uncle Andy, ;)

...then sat at the table, gave thanks,

...and joined fellow Americans from sea to shining sea in continuing the tradition of this day,

...first celebrated almost 500 years ago when our refugee immigrant forefathers and mothers were given sustenance by the Native Americans,

...for which they gave thanks.

Dinner was followed by a pleasant interlude during which some went for a walk,

...some engaged in discourse,

...some rested,

...and some cleaned up,

...and cleared the way for dessert,

...which included among the offerings a dobos torte,

...which is a traditional Hungarian 9-layer chocolate-iced cake made by Mary Jane in honor of the family's Hungarian heritage. It was nagyon finom, which is Hungarian for very delicious.

After dessert Mary Jane pulled out some boxes of their parents' correspondence, photographs and post cards for the family to look over.

Letters from relatives in Hungary.

Everyone took home a few momentos.

It was a good Thanksgiving, I believe.

And not a word of politics passed among us.

6 Comments

We Needed A Little Thrifting, Right That Very Minute

11/23/2016

3 Comments

Last Friday morning the carpet steam-cleaner that I bought from Sears 30 years ago finally gave up the ghost.

A big old hulk that weighed a ton, two tons when filled with cleaning solution and water, and was a mess of wires, hoses, and latches, each of which had to be connected and/or fitted just so to the correct terminus,

...still for over three decades it was a dependable workhorse of a machine that did a nice job on our carpets,

...especially during those years when the carpets were at the mercy of four children

...or five for a while ( see posts from 7/9/2014, 7/10/2014 and 7/11/2014))

...and, of course, the feet or many friends.

      "Gee, you've had that steam cleaner since before I was born," my daughter Theresa sighed when I told her about its demise.
      Each of my children sounded a little sad after I mentioned to them that our old steam cleaner which, despite its weight and complexity they all knew how to assemble and use, had finally died.
     Tom wanted to look for some place in town that might be able to repair it. I knew how he was feeling, still I proposed we let it rest in peace and just buy a new one.
      In truth I know that last Friday it wasn't the loss of an old steam cleaner that had us all feeling kind of down. In truth we, like many of our fellow Americans, were just coming off a hard week and might not have felt any better even if our carpet cleaner hadn't plotzed.
       But life was going on and Tom and I were now faced with the first-world micro-dilemma of either buying a new carpet cleaner or not buying a new carpet cleaner.
         We decided to buy a new one. We decided we wanted a new one exactly like the old one, in other words, one that weighed a ton, was complicated to figure out, and was a chore to use.
         Shows how clearly we two 65-year-olds were thinking last week.
         Anyway, on Saturday morning it was cold, overcast and sprinkling snow when we headed out to the Sears where we bought our first cleaner,

...the Sears at Eastland Mall, an older, rather down-at-the heels mall out on the far east side of Columbus.

      As we turned into the service road leading to the mall Tom gestured towards the row of thrift stores across from the mall. "Let's check out the thrift stores first. I need a new overcoat."
      And I knew at that moment that, more than a new steam cleaner, what we really needed on that grey, gloomy November Saturday morning was a little thrifting to cheer us up.
      I don't know what it is about thrift stores that makes them so appealing to us aficionados.

I guess it's the fun of scavenging up and down the aisles,

...in the company of our fellow thrifters,

...seeking out some treasure,

...for pennies on the dollar.

And this day, Eureka, after some digging around we hit thrift store pay dirt.

Tom found a dashing overcoat, like new, that makes him look like Benedict Cumberbatch in Sherlock .

Don't you think?

And I found some nice warm jammies for my grandbabies to wear when they come to visit from California over Christmas.

Long story short, we never did acquire a new steam cleaner that day, but chose instead to spend the day visiting another thrift store, allegedly to seek out a few more items, in truth just for the fun of it.

We did swing by the Eastland Mall food court for lunch,

...where we opted to dine from a Mexican eatery called Don Paco, basing our choice on the cute, friendly little kid working the counter for his parents, who did the cooking and owned the place.

We split a huge yummy chicken and steak fajita cooked up fresh on the grill and served with generous sides of rice and beans.

After lunch we did a once around the mall, all decked out for Christmas already,

...with a train for the children to ride,

...and Santa Clause already arrived.

Then we headed back out to the thrift superstore across the highway from the mall,

...where we spent a leisurely hour or so perusing the wealth of varied, interesting, and inexpensive pre-owned wares,

...including these two bridal veils which I knew my grand-
daughters would love,

...so I added them to the cart along with our other finds. (By happy chance they were having a special on Christmas cards).

And so, though we came home without a new carpet cleaner, our souls felt soothed by our successful day of thrifting. Those of you who love this past-time will understand. For those who are down and troubled and have never tried thrifting, I say give it a try.

It may be the very tonic for these turbulent times.

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Mike Pence: The Musicals

11/20/2016

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       Alas, poor Mike Pence, he just can't seem to catch a break these days.
      Last Friday night he was booed by the audience at the end of a production of Hamilton when one of the actors, Brandon Victor Dixon, called out a plea on behalf of this diverse country of ours to the Vice President-elect to "protect us, our planet, our children, our parents, defend us and uphold our inalienable rights... uphold our American values and to work on behalf of all of us."
       Mike Pence later assured everybody that he wasn't offended by the booing, appearing as unfazed by the booing as he was oblivious to what Mr. Dixon was trying to communicate to him. In fact the Hamilton event would probably have quickly faded away had not President-elect Donald Trump thrown a Twitter-fit over the whole thing, accusing the Hamilton cast of harassing "Our wonderful future V.P. Mike Pence" and demanding an apology, though some pundits are suggesting that the plethora of indignant tweets sent out by Donald Trump were really just a diversionary tactic to distract the country from the $25 million settlement the court has ordered him to pay to the students who were defrauded of their money by his sham Trump University.
        So now our President-elect has another grudge to add to his grudge list, this one against the cast of Hamilton, which I'm sure the Vice President-elect isn't thrilled about, considering that as long as this grudge goes on it will continue to call attention to the original event of Mike Pence being booed, which, while it may, as he insists, not have bothered him, still I'd expect it's a memory he'd probably rather leave behind.
          Or maybe not. Who knows, maybe having Donald Trump stick up for him on Twitter makes Mike Pence feel good about himself.
       But now, inspired by Mike Pence's Hamilton connection and in view of his persona as well as his connection to the persona of our soon-to-be President, tweeters have been having a heyday out in the Twittersphere with the newest Twitter trend, #NameAPenceMuscial, the idea of which is to make up the title for what might be a Pence-inspired musical.
          Some of the ideas tweeters have come up with are:

           Avenue He Hates LGBTQ
           The Kids Are Alt Right
           Billy (can't love) Elliot
          Annie Get Your IUD Before January 20
          A Funny Thing Happened On The Way To The Muslim Registry Office
          KKKinky Boots
          Rent: But Not To Those People
          You're A Good Man Charlie (Unless You're) Brown
          My Fair Lady...Parts Are Under Attack
          Little Shop Of Horrifying White Supremists
          Withering Rights
          Mikey Pence: The Demon VP Of Pennsylvania Avenue

         ...Among many other clever titles, the list of which continues to grow.
      Of course, maybe being a trending Twitter joke does not bother Mike Pence, staunch Christian crusader that he is, any more than being booed by a theater audience did.
           Or maybe the thickness of his skin will wear down over time and he'll find himself wishing he were back in Indiana signing bills to deny LGBTQ rights, defund women's heath care, promote wage inequality for workers, and cut back aid to the needy.
          But what a wealth of comedic material our country now enjoys.

References:
https://twitter.com/hashtag/NameAPenceMuscial?src=tren

https://www.buzzfeed.com/juliareinstein/name-a-pence-musical?utm_term=.sg3wl6D2V#.ukq3W5o21

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mike_Pence

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Opportunity Lost

11/19/2016

2 Comments

Here is what Hamilton actor Brandon Victor Dixon read

to Mike Pence

as the Vice President-elect was about to leave the theater during the curtain call after Friday night's performance of the show:

   “You know, we have a guest in the audience this evening.
        "Vice President-elect Pence, I see you walking out but I hope you will hear us, just a few more moments. (Addressing the booing audience) There's nothing to boo about here, Ladies and Gentlemen, we're all here sharing the story of love.
      "We have a message for you, Sir, and we hope that you will hear us out. And I encourage everybody to pull out your phones, tweet and post, this message is to be spread far and wide.
      "Vice President-elect Pence, we welcome you, and we truly thank you for joining us here at Hamilton: An American Musical. We really do. We, sir, we are the diverse America who are alarmed and anxious that your new administration will not protect us, our planet, our children, our parents, or defend us and uphold our inalienable rights, Sir. But we truly hope this show has inspired you to uphold our American values and to work on behalf of all of us, all of us. … We truly thank you for sharing this show — this wonderful American story told by a diverse group of men, women, of different colors, creeds, and orientations.”
     Mike Pence listened to Mr. Dixon's speech then continued out of the theater, smiling, according to reports, as he stepped out onto the sidewalk.
     But what if, instead of turning and leaving in silence, our soon-to-be Vice President had risen to the moment and responded to Mr. Dixon? What if this man who could potentially find himself in the role of the most powerful leader of the planet had taken a just a minute or two to assure Mr. Dixon, to assure all of us that there was no need for anxiety or alarm, that he was where he was for the very purpose of upholding our American values and working on behalf of all Americans, whatever their color, creed, or orientation? What if Mike Pence had said something, anything, to assuage the fear many of us have at this moment that we are about to enter an era of oppression against minorities, the vulnerable, people of color, Muslims, Hispanics, members of the LGBTQ community? What if our Vice Presidet-elect had heard the message, understood it for the anxious plea that it was, understood what it was that was being asked of him and likewise understood at that moment his own position of strength and leadership?
     What if Mike Pence had offered even the most minimal response, any response, something as simple as "I hear you"?   Could those few words not have calmed, at least to some degree, the fear of many people in this country expressed in Brandon Victor Dixon's words? Would not those few words, or any words of conciliation, understanding and leadership from our Vice President-elect have taken us a quantum leap towards national healing and coming together?
     But no. Mike Pence's silence to Brandon Victor Dixon's appeal continues. Apparently our Vice President-elect took offense at Mr. Dixon's words, took them as a personal attack,

...as did our President-elect, who responded to news of the Hamilton actor's post-performance words with a barrage of tweets.

     His initial tweet was: "Our wonderful future V.P. Mike Pence was harassed last night at the theater by the cast of Hamilton, cameras blazing.This should not happen!"
     Mr. Trump soon followed up with : "The Theater must always be a safe and special place. The cast of Hamilton was very rude last night to a very good man, Mike Pence. Apologize!"
     Brandon Victor Dixon replied to Donald Trump with: "Conversation is not harassment sir. And I appreciate Mike Pence for stopping to listen.";
      Trump shot back: "Very rude and insulting of Hamilton cast member to treat our great future V.P. Mike Pence to a theater lecture. Couldn't even memorize lines!"
     What a golden opportunity was presented last Friday night to Donald Trump to seize the moment, begin to fulfill the beautiful promise of his election victory speech to reach out to all Americans, to seek help and guidance from us all, and to unite us all, Democrats and Republicans, people of all religions, races, backgrounds and beliefs.
     It was an opportunity squandered. Sadly, once again ego trumped wisdom.

References:
http://fortune.com/2016/11/19/mike-pence-hamilton-musical/

http://www.nytimes.com/2016/11/20/us/politics/hamilton-cast-mike-pence-donald-trump.html?_r=0

http://www.msn.com/en-us/news/politics/social-media-explodes-over-hamilton-trump-duel/ar-

http://www.cnn.com/2016/11/18/politics/mike-pence-hamilton-musical/index.html

2 Comments

What The World Needs Now

11/18/2016

0 Comments

     Today I thought I'd re-share this post from one year ago today.
    "The terrible events of last week" I was referring to at that time were the November 13, 2015 terrorist bombings in Paris.
      A year later in our own country some of us are still numb or reeling from or just trying to deal with what we see as the terrible events of last week, and so I thought, well, different year, different events, but my friend Sharon's message still shines:

     In response to the terrible events of last week a friend of mine, Sharon, a beautiful lady, as you can see from her picture below,

....who's equally beautiful on the inside, as you can gather from this picture of her from the early 1970's when she was volunteering among the poor in Appalachia,

....posted this a few days ago on her Facebook page:
       Let's start a LOVE bomb crusade. It occurs to me that all the people who are participating in killing and maiming around the world have too little love in them. How about if all of us, around the world, devote one minute each day at noon in our time zone, to send love out into the world? This would create a perpetual love cascade that just might shift the tide of all this horror that is going on around us these days. Who's in this with me? Please share with everyone you know. It just might make a difference.
      Yesterday I enlisted as a foot soldier in Sharon's Love Crusade.   I had an appointment at noon, but as near the hour as I could I found a moment in a quiet spot, closed my eyes, and sent out love to everybody on the planet. Sharon's right. It did make a difference. It made me feel better. More peaceful. More hopeful. More kind. At least for a few moments. And I'm going to do it everyday from now on.
      And though it won't likely make any difference if you and I stop what we're doing once a day to send out love to the world, if everybody on the planet did it it just might, as Sharon suggested, stop the tide of horror going on all around us. So I'm on board.
      Anybody else want to join the crusade to bomb the planet with love?
      It just might be prove to be a more effective cure for our world's troubles than the other kind of bomb.

0 Comments

Safety Pin Nation

11/15/2016

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I've started wearing a safety pin.

For anybody out there who hasn't yet hear of safety pin-wearing, it's a movement that started in the United Kingdom after the Brexit vote resulted in a staggering increase in incidents of violence against immigrants and people of color. The wearing of a safety pin in the U.K. became a protest against these hate crimes and a message to people vulnerable to attacks sparked by racism and bigotry that they are not alone, that they have allies. The pin makes the statement that its wearer is a safe person, a person who can be turned to for help if one feels threatened or afraid.
Here in the U.S. within days after Donald Trump's election there were already hundreds of episodes of the same kind of marginalization of and hateful behavior towards minorities, and so Americans have joined in the wearing of a safety pin with the same message of rejection of racism and bigotry and as a pledge to be a safe person, an ally, a witness, and, in so far as we are able, a defender.

     There have been critics of the Safety Pin movement, those who say that wearing a pin is a facile gesture, no more than a self-aggrandizing fashion accessory for white people, a poor substitution for doing something meaningful.
       I'll admit that at first I, too, weighed similar misgivings about wearing a safety pin. Don't actions speak louder than symbols? Couldn't people just stand up for the rights of their fellow human beings without wearing a pin?
        Well, yes, but wearing the pin may make it easier to do so.
       First of all, the act of attaching the pin and wearing it daily can serve as a reminder, a raising of one's consciousness to the reality of the injustice and abuse that people here in our own country, likely in our own community, are being subjected to. Not that minorities haven't always been subjected to mistreatment, but in this past week it's gotten it's worse, especially among school children.

And then the deplorable act on President-
elect Donald Trump's part of appointing a despicable white supremist as his chief advisor is equal to giving a blessing to all acts social injustice towards minorities.

And so we must all face the fact that these days any one of us of any race, religion, ethnicity, gender or orientation could in fact find ourselves witnessing an insult or verbal or even physical harassment against a vulnerable person. But maybe just being visible in a public with a pin attached to one's coat or collar representing a (sort of) organization that stands against such behavior could be enough to discourage a bigot from an acting out. Because the pledge that goes with the pin is that the wearer will not ignore an act of abuse against a vulnerable person. We will do what we can to take the person's part.

A 22-year-old French artist who goes by the pen-name Maeril,

...created a cartoon with step-by-step instructions for actions to be taken by by-standers who witness an act of harassment taking place.

The Twitter site @SafetyPinNation offered the following guide, which includes pulling out one's cell phone and recording the incident when possible.

     In truth my main trepidation about wearing the safety pin in public is that if I should ever witness an incident of harassment against a marginalized person I might hesitate, or not know what to do, or do the wrong thing, or choke and end up doing nothing at all.
    In truth I am, like many people, pretty conflict-averse.
    But then maybe I actually do have it within me to rise to adversity though I may not yet know it. Maybe all good people do have it somewhere within them. Hopefully wearing the pin will help make all of us who wear it braver, less afraid to do the right thing.
      A safety pin is not something people have to go to much effort to find. It's not exclusive. It's something most of us already possess. We just need to dig it out of the drawer and pin it on. And then, hopefully, be able to do the same with the courage of our convictions.

References:
http://www.nytimes.com/2016/11/14/fashion/safety-pin-ally-activism.html

http://www.seattletimes.com/nation-world/safety-pin-movement-takes-hold-amid-trump-presidency-fears/

https://twitter.com/SafetyPinNation

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Paranoia Strikes Deep. Into My Life It Did creep

11/14/2016

4 Comments

I woke up yesterday morning in a state of medium-level anxiety.
The thing was, the previous week I'd make plans with my daughter Theresa and her wife, Callie, to visit them in Cincinnati for the day, go out out for lunch, maybe do some shopping.

Callie and Theresa.

     But we'd made the plans days before Donald Trump was elected and days before the subsequent outbreak all across the country of assaults, verbal abuse and harassment against people of color, Muslims, Hispanics, and members of the LGBTQ community that followed his election.
      Funny thing: before Donald Trump's election, though I know that Callie has sometimes felt some trepidation going into public places, I never felt any concern while being out in public with Callie. I felt proud of her and my daughter and I celebrated their happiness and I always looked forward to our get-togethers.
       But yesterday was different. Yesterday I wondered if some newly-empowered bigot would make a mean or threatening remark to Theresa and Callie in the restaurant or in a store, or maybe even try something worse than just a remark. Or what if we were accosted by a group? What would I do, what could I do to protect daughter and her wife? If they were physically or verbally harassed or insulted how would I hide my own anger and hurt and what would I say to try and alleviate theirs?
       All these uneasy thoughts swirled around my brain while I drove from Columbus to Cincinnati. I wondered if these were the same thoughts that have always gone through the minds of African-American mothers.
       While I didn't want to infect Callie and Theresa with my own anxieties about the Trump Effect since they didn't seem overly worried about it, on the way to the restaurant I did casually mention that I hoped we wouldn't run into anybody who felt like being a jerk since the election. My daughter-in-law assured me that we wouldn't have to worry about that happening at the place we were going to. I also reminded her, as I always do, that I'd go with her to the Ladies' Room. Again she chuckled that that wouldn't be necessary where we were going.   I wondered what place we could be going to that was so indubitably friendly.
       That place turned out to be The Al-Amir Cafe, a small, charming Middle Eastern restaurant in Blue Ash, a suburb of Cincinnati,

...where we were, in fact, greeted with the warmest smile by the owner upon our entrance.

      The owner appeared to be of Middle Eastern background, and though his English was limited, his friendliness was not.
      Nor was his ability to make a fantastic gyro.
      All three of us ordered the gyro platter.

Theresa and Callie had the gyro with rice,

...a beautifully plated dish served with a lovely super-fresh side salad and saffron rice garnished with parsley and a mild and pleasant reddish spice called sumac,

...while I ordered my gyro, equally beautifully plated, with a side of wonderfully hot and crispy fries, also pleasantly seasoned with sumac.

These gyros were hands down the best I've ever had, owing, I'm guessing, to the freshness of the lamb,

... which was sliced by the owner to order from a cylinder of lamb on spit behind the counter. The lamb is on the left, I'm not sure what kind of meat that was on the right, though Callie thought it was chicken.

    I'll admit my post-Trump anxiety level was ever so much lower after our great lunch at Al-Amir, as my daughter and daughter-in-law predicted it would be.
    Callie and Theresa suggested we next walk around Jungle Jim's, a massive international supermarket located nearby.
       There are two Jungle Jim's stores in Cincinnati, one of which I'd visited a couple of years ago (see post from 8/11/2014), and this one, the larger of the two,

...which was the size of a shopping mall,

...and carried a mind-boggling variety of items from around the world.

Ostrich eggs.

    As Theresa and Callie felt like wandering off into different departments I opted to stick by Callie, my radar for trouble still on low, if not high alert. I just sort of kept an eye on the people around us, none of whom, in truth seemed to have the slightest interest in anything but going about their own business.
    There was one moment, though, in the India aisle, when I noticed a man looking right at Callie and heading right up behind her. I quickly, deftly positioned myself between the man and Callie, cutting him off then sort of herding Callie down the aisle away from the man. However I felt kind of sheepish when I realized that the guy was just trying to get to the same spice that Callie'd been looking at. He must have thought me one rude old lady.
    There was another moment when we were perusing the vast bakery department in all its wonderfulness,

...when a big middle-aged guy standing nearby picked up an item and asked no one in particular, "What is a chess pie?"
   When Callie approached the man and started explaining to him what a chess pie was I began mentally beseeching her not to engage this man, as I had profiled him based on his looks and verbal inflection as the very type who might, just might, not take well to Callie's existence. I stood close by, though, ready to spring into I knew not what action.
     A moment later a second middle-aged, middle-American-looking man sidled up to the first man and asked him what he was looking at. Then the two men walked off together and I watched them for a few moments as they continued chatting and shopping.
     "Do you think those two guys are partners?" I asked Callie after they were out of ear shot.
     "I'm sure they are," Callie responded, "I saw them holding hands earlier."
     In the veggie aisle a saleslady called us over to sample some marinated green beans. While we stood over the green bean samples I could see out of the corner of my eye a woman staring at us. When I glanced over she caught my eye and gave me a big, open engaging smile, which I returned.
       She's an ally, I thought.
       As Theresa, Callie and I were saying our good-byes before I left for Columbus I joked - or rather half-joked - that I have to stop being so paranoid. Callie agreed and pointed out that after all, people aren't going to change for the worse overnight.
     Though it would be nice if some of them would change for the better.

References:
http://www.msn.com/en-us/news/us/racist-incidents-are-up-since-donald-trump%e2%80%99s-election-these-are-just-a-few-of-them/ar-AAkfB2h?li=BBnb7Kz&ocid=UP97DHP

https://www.splcenter.org/hatewatch/2016/11/11/over-200-incidents-hateful-harassment-and-intimidation-election-day

http://www.salon.com/2016/11/13/this-is-trumps-america-lgbt-community-fears-surge-in-hate-crimes-following-reports-of-homophobic-attacks/

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/michael-rowe/why-hasnt-donald-trump-de_b_12916046.html

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Melania, This Is Your Moment

11/12/2016

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A few days before the election our future First Lady Melania Trump announced that if her husband were elected President her mission as First Lady would be to lead a crusade against bullying among children and teen-agers, especially on social media.

     This will be an excellent and very timely cause for our First Lady to undertake and I support her all the way,
       But what an admirable service Melania Trump could do for her country if instead of waiting until the day after her husband's inauguration she spoke up now, today, against the in-school bullying of children of color, Muslim children and Hispanic children that has in truth been fueled in recent months by her husband's campaign rhetoric and has exponentially proliferated in the few days since his election (see yesterday's post).
      How quickly would our First-Lady-to-be win all of our esteem if she used her ability and her new position of influence to this end. How it would warm and calm the hearts of all Americans if our future President and First Lady spoke out in tandem, Donald Trump with the purpose of stopping the outbreak of hate crimes and, by extension, the protests against his own perceived
support of those crimes, and Melania to the children and teen-agers of this country, telling them, as you told us last week, that, "we have to find a better way to talk to each other, to disagree with each other, to respect each other", teaching them what it means to be a good true American as well what being a good true American doesn't mean.
     So Melania if you do, as you told us, worry about our children, then I ask you to speak to and for our children now and show us by your example how we can begin to, in your words, "teach our youth American values. Kindness, honesty, respect, compassion, charity, understanding, cooperation."
     Speak now, before another child is hurt. Let us hear your voice. Show us your heart.

Reference:
https://www.donaldjtrump.com/press-releases/melania-trump-remarks-on-her-husbands-leadership-qualities-and-securing-our

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