“As a courtesy to the next passenger may we suggest you use your towel to wipe off the wash basin.”
Now, as I tend to be a rule-follower and like to think of myself as the avatar of courtesy in all situations, I do in fact usually wipe out the basin as a courtesy to the next passenger, for whom I also hold the door if possible, or even take it upon myself to be the squeezee while allowing the other person to be the squeezer when the space outside the bathroom door will not accommodate two bodies. Which it usually won't.
But for some reason on a bathroom visit during the final flight of this past trip - I don't know whether it was because I got squeezed a little to tightly on my way into the bathroom, or maybe it was because because I was being squeezed a little too tightly the whole trip by the person of size who was wedged in next to me, or maybe it was because by the time I got to the bathroom there were no more paper towels left for me to dry my hands or wipe out the basin with - anyway, upon reading that condescending little bathroom sermonette it occurred to me that, since the airlines are so very concerned about us, perhaps I could do them the service of suggesting some things they could start doing as a courtesy to the passengers.
So, airlines, as a courtesy to all the passengers, may I suggest you:
1. Go back to allowing the first bag to be checked for free. Bringing one suitcase on a plane trip is a necessity, not a luxury.
2. Stop charging extra for an aisle, window, or emergency exit seat.
3. Stop charging extra to allow people traveling together to sit together. Especially families with children. I mean, that's not just greedy, that's wrong.
4. Stop charging hundreds of dollars if a person has an emergency and has to change their flight. I mean, what's it to you? It takes, like, a minute on the computer to change someone's flight and what difference does it make if somebody fills an empty seat on one plane or another?
5. Don't even think about starting to charge people to bring carry-on luggage. Though I know you have been thinking about it because one of the flight attendants I was talking to let it out of the bag that you are.
6. Enforce for other people besides me the rule of only one bag of the designated size. I've seen people stack two bags and pass them off as one or cram behemoths the size of golf bags into the over-heads while I was once given grief for my carry-on bag, which was of the acceptable size. (Or, I mean, it would have been of the acceptable size. If I hadn't crammed and stretched it to within an inch of it's life).
7. Standardize the check-in protocol at all airports. When I have a bag to check I never know whether I need to first stand in line for the check-in kiosk then stand in line for the desk to check my bag, or go directly to the line for the desk to check in myself and my baggage at the same time.
8. When there are two or more people traveling together, don't allow some members of the group to zip through the quick pre-check line while making the other members wait to go through the long security lines. That's just rude.
9. If, over and above the exorbitant price of our plane ticket, you insist on charging us through the nose to check a suitcase, have an aisle seat, sit with our family, change our ticket, buy flight insurance, provide us with a movie, the internet or a meager snack during our flight, then may I suggest that you at least be decent enough to provide us with planes that are of an adequate size so that people do not spill over into each other's seats and that there is tolerable space between the seat rows. According to the news there has been a recent spate of in-flight fights over people leaning back in their chairs and infringing on the space of the people sitting behind them. These incidents, which have been nasty, are the fault of the airlines, who, in seeking to increase their profits by decreasing plane size, have socially engineered this hostile seat situation during flights. I suggest that the airlines take responsibility.
10. Finally, as a courtesy to the passengers may I suggest that the paid airline staff pop into the bathrooms from time to time and wipe out the dang basins themselves?! ;)
Everyone have a wonderful weekend. 8)