I Don't Want To Hear a Word About The Barbie Movie!

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​I DON'T WANT TO HEAR A WORD ABOUT THE BARBIE MOVIE!

     Seriously. I don't want to hear anything about the new, much-ballyhooed Barbie Movie. Not a word. 
       If you, along with half of the civilized world, went to see "Barbie" upon its opening today, I don't want to hear about it. I don't want to hear how much you loved it or how much you hated it. I don't want to know if it was totally awesome or totally awful. And I sure as heck don't want to know a single scene, line, or detail from the movie
       If you read or listened to one of the ubiquitous reviews of "Barbie" dominating the news and airways, please keep it to yourself. I don't want to know what the reviewers had to say. To which end, when I opened the Arts section of the New York Times yesterday,

...I quickly flipped it over and reached for the Op-ed page. I'd far rather read about how Ron Desantis is trying to crush the Budweiser beer company for one of its subsidiary brews having the brazen effrontery to be the beer of choice of a transgender influencer,

​...than to read one word about the Barbie movie.
        This is not because I hate Barbie. Au contraire; I love Barbie. I've loved Barbie since I first saw her on a TV commercial when I was seven years old and had to have a Barbie doll immediately,

...and no, I couldn't possibly possibly wait until my upcoming eighth birthday to get one.
​      I loved my Barbie doll better than any toy I ever owned, and playing Barbies with my friends and sewing clothes for my Barbie were my favorite childhood past times. Until I started high school. I'm not lying. 
        I never for a minute bought into the supercilious theory that Barbie's looks and unrealistic build promotes poor self or body image in girls, and when my daughters came along I bought them Barbies to their hearts' content and continued sewing and crocheting clothes for their dolls. It was my joy to make Barbie furniture and Barbie houses out of cardboard for my Barbie-loving grand daughters.
      The truth is, I was - and still am - a Barbie super fan, and I can't wait to see the movie.​

      But in the meantime I don't want to know a thing about the movie, not a thing. I want to be able to savor every minute of "Barbie," and every minute revealed prior will be a minute spoiled.
       In, fact, I think I'm going to have to go see it tomorrow, and then maybe another time or two.
          But don't worry, I won't tell you anything about it.