She spoke, among other things, about being a parent, and the one thing I still remember her saying is that for us parents when one of our children is in some way not well it's as if we're no longer part of the world around us because all we can do is focus on is our child. And it's only when our child is well again that we can rejoin the rest of the world. I think that must be the corollary to the axiom that you're only as happy as your saddest child.
Anyway, all of the above is true, as we parents know. And just in case I hadn't already learned how true it is, I had another opportunity to learn this past Monday when my son Tommy had arthroscopic hip surgery to repair a torn labrum and fix a misshaped hip bone.
As I understand it, the tear in Tommy's labrum, which is a ring of cartilage lining the hip socket, was caused by his "saddle hip", which means that the ball of his hip bone wasn't fitting correctly into the socket and the constant poking of the bad-fitting hip bone against the labrum caused it to tear, leaving him in nearly constant pain.
The operation consisted of the surgeon shaving off a bit of the hip-ball part so that now it fits better into the socket and won't go poking into his labrum or anything else it shouldn't be poking into. After he fixed the hip the surgeon repaired the tear in the labrum.
The surgeon said that the operation went very well, and the nurses said that the post-op recovery went very well, and so Tommy was released from the hospital the same day.
But as soon as we arrived home Tommy wasn't doing very well. The pain meds he'd received in the hospital had already worn off and it took an hour to get his pain prescriptions filled at Krogers.
Then I found the pill instructions confusing: take pill "A" every 4 hours and pill "B" every 6 hours and pill "C" twice a day and pill "D" once a day but not at the same time as pill"C"....so, did that mean take pill "D" between the 2 doses of pill "C" or did it mean take "C" twice one day and alternate with "D" once the next day?
I called the Kroger's pharmacist for enlightenment but she didn't think Tommy should be taking pill "D" at all if he was already taking pill "C".
So I gave Tommy pills "A", "B" and "D", which gave him about as much relief as three tic-tacs. Three hours after I'd given him the pills he was still in so much pain that, though I tried to comfort him, I was feeling frantic inside, transported to that place where the rest of the world was eclipsed by the world of my son's pain and my fear.
I called his surgeon who assured me that the pain was normal, that first day was always the worst, and that he'd be better by tomorrow; but in the meantime I could triple his dosage of pill "A" and absolutely do have him take both pills "C" and "D".
So we tripled pill "A", threw in pill "C" and, miraculously, the pain finally started to retreat, to the great relief of us both.
That first night home was still a fairly rough one - for Tommy and by extension for me; but that first, worst, night is now, thankfully, in the past; the next two days and nights have been better.
Tommy's recovery period is 6 weeks so I guess it will be that long before I fully return to the world. But I'm two days closer than I was .
Tomorrow: Hard-Core PT ASAP